11 Ways To Lead From Behind

Cecelia Gilchriest seemed, in my view, to be a de facto administrator and a de facto attorney to those she worked with in two of the most prestigious arts institutions in the country, Lincoln Center for the Performing Arts and American Ballet Theatre. For 22 years at Lincoln Center, she was the one nearly everyone turned to if they wanted something done and done well. That’s why they awarded her the prestigious Lincoln Center Directors’ Emeriti Award for exceptional service in 2007, the highest award an employee could receive.

In addition, for over 25 years she in effect marketed and managed, as well as produced about 15 events benefiting charities, for the Fred Astaire Dance Studio on the Upper West Side of New York City – when she wasn’t training there for the next ballroom dance competition.

As Darius Mosteika, one of the studio directors (and Cecelia’s primary dance partner), wrote on the GoFundMe page for her family, “For over 25 years her help, patience and creativity were instrumental in producing all of our Dance Among the Stars showcases. She was not only a wonderful dancer, producer, and friend but she will go down in history as a legend for being a fairy godmother to many of our staff members as well as other dancers from across the world for helping them to come to this country to represent the United States in the highly competitive field of ballroom dance. Her dedication, knowledge, generosity, ability and commitment have been a gift to all of us.“

Gilchriest wanted her work to speak for itself – unless of course she was in a ballroom dance competition, where she won many awards – and was focused on lifting the burdens of those she worked with, respected, enjoyed and loved. I could regale you with dozens of stories of her enormous intellect, brilliant writing and editing, creativity, talent, gracefulness, dedication, kindness, generosity, and lifelong passion for the theatre, dance, film, performing arts institutions and her people. I know, because she was one of my best friends for 27 years. (So, I will refer to her as Cecelia in the balance of this story, taking personal privilege.)

Proof of her profound impact was palatable in the hundreds of people who paid their respects upon her untimely passing last week, in person, online, through flowers and gestures and donations to the GoFundMe page for her family.

Cecelia Gilchriest may have been in the wings most of the time, but make no mistake about it, she was leading from behind.

Here are 11 insights we can all gain from how she had such a powerful impact:

· Get organized: Always meticulous, Cecilia would likely tell us that the first thing to do is to think through the outcome and then re-engineer it to create a list of steps that need to happen to get there. I make spreadsheets.

· Do your research: Cecelia was a master of research. I sometimes wished she would have designed a search engine.

· Identify what must be done by the boss (the director, the stars, etc.) and then figure out who does everything else.

· Let them think it’s their idea: Cecelia was always the force behind the stars, whether it was the board or the general counsel, or the professional dancers/teachers. One of her secret weapons was her way of presenting ideas and seeing them through so that the “stars” owned the ideas as their own. They would then invest in the ideas completely.

· Inspire them as if they are volunteers: Cecelia treated everyone as if they were volunteers, and with the utmost kindness and graciousness, even if they were paid. It would enroll their help fully and show her respect for their time, effort and expertise.

· Show people what’s in it for them: One way she would inspire was to tap into whatever engaged them, whether it was the cause the benefit was for, or their love of dance, or their support for the mission of the organization, or tickets to an event (if she could offer them).

· Be resourceful and creative: Cecelia would find remarkable, creative solutions to challenges, whether it was how to make a theatre set with no budget, how to get one of the elaborate and specific ballroom dance competition gowns in a hurry, or how to pack carryon luggage only for a competition to avoid the risk of bags being lost.

· Follow your values and your passion: Working in the performing arts was her passion and she leveraged her brilliant intellect and seemingly limitless energy to do all she could from where she sat to bring the artistic vision to reality. Using her abilities and assets for what she believed in gave her fuel and joy. Making sure to spend quality time with her family was always a priority too.

· Train others and delegate: She trained her replacements, temporary or permanent ones, at Lincoln Center in great detail, making sure she thought of everything they could possibly need to know. I would say that she didn’t delegate enough in real time, though, often thinking it was easier or faster to do it herself.

· Be willing to step in anytime: Being the force behind the stars for her always meant being willing to step in to do anything she could to make the production or project a success.

· Take care of yourself, including by finding a way to vent: Cecelia would take care of herself, though perhaps not enough, as we now know from losing her way too early. She would find ways to vent, including on the dance floor and with good friends and family, but perhaps this is a cautionary lesson we can all learn.

As her friend, I will add one more, and that is to take a bow, let others honor you and thank you. Cecelia was extraordinarily generous and humble, which was admirable.

But we need to be fed emotionally ourselves as well, and I think we could all learn from watching her that it is good to let others thank you, help you, and give to you, as well.

Rest in peace, my friend. The world is a better, more creative place because you were in it and lived so fully and graciously.