4 Ways To De-Escalate Conflict At Work

Most of us would rather avoid conflict if we can, but the reality is that conflict is an inevitable part of life. It is also an inevitable part of work. There are bound to be occasions when we disagree with our colleagues – and a certain amount of disagreement is healthy, because it encourages us to adapt, innovate, consider the views of others and not fall victim to “groupthink”.

But, sometimes, conflict at work can be toxic, rather than constructive. In situations like this, it is down to the leader to play a de-escalating role. So, what should they do?

1. Adopt a people-centered, values-driven approach

“Dysfunctional conflict occurs when situations are left unaddressed and allowed to bubble under the surface,” says David Liddle, CEO and chief consultant at mediation services provider The TCM Group and author of Managing Conflict. “In the absence of constructive dialogue, these situations can quickly escalate into full-blown disputes, causing untold damage and distress to the parties involved and everyone around them.”

According to Liddle, the key to building a positive workplace culture is to reframe the formal, litigation-inspired processes of the past (the traditional disciplinary and grievance procedures) and embrace a more people-centered, values-driven approach. “In other words,” he says, “putting dialogue center stage and using collaborative, empathetic approaches, such as mediation, coaching and facilitated conversations to resolve conflicts, complaints and concerns.”

Taking a more compassionate, empathetic approach helps to foster stronger relationships, says Liddle. It also improves productivity and ensures people can be the best possible versions of themselves. He adds: “These are the antecedents, drivers and enablers of a high-performing organization.”

2. Create an environment of psychological safety

Conflict can be a particular problem in hybrid teams, due to people having limited opportunities to discuss disagreements face-to-face and the heighted risk that messages sent by digital channels are misinterpreted. So, leaders need to think about how they can create a psychologically safe environment in which people can express themselves without fear of sanction, according to Guy Lubitsh, professor in leadership and psychology at Hult International Business School.

Lubitsh suggests that leaders organize forums where staff at all levels can discuss some of the painful emotions arising from difficult relationships, as well as the allocation of resources and any feelings of lack of trust and isolation. “The virtual space may have made it easier for teams to avoid difficult conversations,” he says. “So it is vital that leaders encourage face-to-face opportunities for honest team conversations on key areas of conflict or tension, as well as team dynamics. When conflict arises, instead of letting things fester, leaders and team members should pick up the phone and talk directly to each other.”

3. Appreciate different communication styles

“Miscommunication usually arises from the mistaken belief that others value the same communication style as we do and will react to it in the same way we would,” says Ang Brennan, head of learning and talent at global people development company Insights. “This is rarely the case as we are all different and can react differently in different situations. Resolution can only come about when we understand the differences between our communication styles and learn how to work with those differences.”

Brennan believes that “proactively developing awareness of self and others is crucial for us to understand and act on different communication styles”. Insights helps organizations to develop awareness through the use of color – a non-judgmental language for teams to talk about interpersonal preferences.

“We have seen firsthand how using a common language such as this to understand preferences can transform interpersonal communication, resulting in better-performing teams and leading to the resolution of any conflict within the team,” Brennan explains. “Heightened awareness enables strong relationships at all levels, better equipping everyone to navigate the physical distance of hybrid working and have those difficult conversations in more positive and impactful ways.”

4. Be sensitive to language differences

“Within teams made up of many nationalities, language differences can be a major source of conflict,” notes Marie-Therese Claes, professor of gender and diversity at business school WU Vienna, who teaches on the CEMS master’s degree in international management.

“While many people speak the ‘international language’ of English, we use English words with our own native meaning,” says Claes. “This can result in a person being insulted or ignored by another without the latter even realizing that their behavior has created bad feelings.”

To prevent conflict from happening within your multicultural teams, make sure that everybody understands the same thing and is not afraid to ask for clarification. Claes adds: “If a misunderstanding happens, clarify for both parties immediately. Do not let bad feelings fester.”

It is vital to check meaning when working with colleagues, especially if they are from a very different culture, according to Claes. She describes this as “a first small, but important, step to avoiding unhealthy conflict.”