Jesse Tyler Ferguson On Balancing A Hollywood Career And Fatherhood

Jesse Tyler Ferguson is widely recognized as Uncle Mitch from the hit sitcom, Modern Family. America fell in love with Mitch, Cam, and the rest of the cast. He and Eric Stonestreet broke ground as it was the first time a major network had shown a long-term, committed gay relationship. The Tony Award-winning actor hasn’t slowed down since the TV series ended in 2020. He’s been busy on Broadway, starring in movies, and being a father to two beautiful boys (Beckett and Sullivan) with his husband, Justin Mikita. During our interview we discussed lessons from his childhood, the real challenges about leading a successful career while being a present dad, invaluable career advice — and of course, baby formula.

Omaid Homayun: What did your parents do for a living and how did that impact some of the choices you’ve made in your career?

Jesse Tyler Ferguson: I was born in Missoula, Montana, but I grew up in Albuquerque, New Mexico. My dad was part of the military as a microbiologist for the state lab in Albuquerque, which is why we ended up there. My mother is a retired OB/GYN nurse.

They actually had no connection to the arts, whatsoever. It wasn’t until my mom took me to see a production of Alice in Wonderland at the Albuquerque Civic Light Opera — that I fell in love with it. Watching these kids on stage made me wante to be on the other side of the footlights.

My mom enrolled me into a program and I think she was really surprised that I wanted to do it because I was such a shy kid. For me it was about finding people that had similar interests and that’s sort of always been my chosen family.

Omaid Homayun: What is one of the most important lessons you’ve learned from your parents?

Jesse Tyler Ferguson: I have this sort of delayed empathy for them that I didn’t expect to have. I try to remember how they handled certain situations and sometimes I find myself looking for alternatative ways to handle things.

We’ve changed so much as a society and there are different ways of raising kids now. I’m interested in the challenges of incorporating the lessons and values that my parents taught me, but also honoring where we are as a society today.

Omaid Homayun: Did you feel like you needed kids to have a fulfilled life?

Jesse Tyler Ferguson: I never felt I needed children to feel fulfilled, but now that I have them I couldn’t imagine it otherwise. It feels like if you reverse engineered it, it would feel like there was a huge void in your life.

My husband, Justin, was working on the Proposition 8 case towards marriage equality and I think for him being a parent was always something that he had in mind.

After meeting him it was obvious that this was something that we were going to do and I was excited about it. But for me it always felt like a pipe dream to raise a family because when I was growing up there was no one in pop culture or on television that represented the life that I wanted to have, which is why doing a show like Modern Family was so important and impactful for me because I’m able to be that pop culture representation for kids now.

Omaid Homayun: Was there a lesson you learned from your experience in Modern Family that you’d want to carry over and instill in your family?

Jesse Tyler Ferguson: Someone once asked if I would take any advice from Mitchell as a parent. I said no, immediately. I’d probably go to Claire for advice, first.

There was a levity to Mitch and Cam. They were freaking out about doing everything right, but they also knew how to laugh with one another. I think it’s important to not take things too seriously and have fun with your partner if you’re lucky enough to be going through this process with someone else.

Omaid Homayun: It’s obvious how ambitious you are in your career and your intentionality of being a present dad. When you think of the sacrifices you have to make — what do you to to show up as the best version of yourself at home and at work?

Jesse Tyler Ferguson: It’s hard, I’m still figuring that out to be perfectly honest. Beckett was born during a pandemic and I had all the time in the world to be with him. When Sully was born, I was literally doing a show in New York on Broadway and I’d come home on my day off for just a few hours to see him before having to turn back around.

I think it’s very important that both Justin and I do the things that make us happy, and I love being an actor. It’s important work in a lot of ways — certainly in terms of something like Modern Family that that brought a same sex couple into so many people’s living rooms.

It also gave me such incredible joy and I want Beckett and Sullivan see that the things that make you happy are important and you need to see those through, and that there are sacrifices that come with it.

I think a lot of it is just having empathy and compassion for myself and letting myself off the hook because I tend to feel guilty about those things. I have to remind myself that it’s important to do the things that make me happy because in turn that will make me a happier parent and better dad.

Omaid Homayun: Why did you and Justin choose to feed Enfamil for your bundle of joy?

Jesse Tyler Ferguson: While doing our research we noticed it kept appearing at the top of the list. We also discovered that Enfamil Enspire Optimum has been designed to be the closest thing to breast milk and that it contains lactoferrin which is an important protein that helps support digestive health. There are many stressors with being a new parent and making sure your baby has the right nutrients should be the last thing on your list of things to worry about.

Omaid Homayun: Any pro feeding tips?

Jesse Tyler Ferguson: Not anything revolutionary, but we are pretty strict with our schedule. What’s great about feeding time is that it helps me slow down because I get to have 20 minutes to feed him without distractions like being on my phone.

Omaid Homayun: What’s a good piece of career advice you’ve received?

Jesse Tyler Ferguson: Modern Family became an overnight success and people were suddenly wanting to take our photos. Ed O’Neil told me to just try to avoid drunk people because it’s a lose-lose situation. He said if you take the photo he guaranteed they’ll abuse it and it’ll never be enough — so just avoid people when they’re intoxicated.

Omaid Homayun: What is the bad career advice people should ignore?

Jesse Tyler Ferguson: I studied musical theater and people expected you to be great at everything. You had to take dancing, singing, and acting glasses. I just feel like it’s okay to excel at certain things and not others. That’s when I started booking work because I was being truthful to the talents I had.

Watch a clip of Jesse discussing work-life balance:

Listen to the full interview with Jesse Tyler Ferguson here